Why My Future Children Will Not Have an Elf on the Shelf

Found this in a random Google search - CREEPY!

I’ve heard raves from parents that love their Elf on the Shelf. Some said their kids look forward to it every year, some say their kids are so much better behaved during the Christmas season. As much as I enjoy seeing my Facebook friend’s pictures of the creative ideas they’ve come up with for their Elf on the Shelf, I for one have made the executive decision that my future child or children will never have one. (And yes, Kevin agrees. Sorry, future children – no allowance and no Elf on the Shelf.)

Let’s break this down – an Elf shows up sent from Santa and your child needs to name him/her. For the next few weeks the elf – that has no feet – will hang out in the home and watch over your child. But wait, sitting on the shelf is not just it. While the child is sleeping, the elf will get up and move around the house. In the morning the child finds the elf doing some sort of activity.

So some may be wondering why I would deprive my future children of the “fun” and “magic” that is Elf on the Shelf. Well…

1) It’s creepy. The whole concept AND the look. He has no feet and what is with that creepy smirk? Is he waiting to hurt you in the night or simply hoping you’ll screw up so he can go back and tell Santa on you?

2) He sends mixed messages. While I’ve seen many  Facebook pictures with the Elf doing cute things around the house, I’ve also seen many where he’s doing things that would be deemed “naughty” by Santa’s standards. Why does the elf get to bake cookies and not clean up after himself?

3) Isn’t Santa enough? I thought he knew when we were sleeping, awake, good, bad, etc. … so why does he suddenly need to send an elf to help? I’m all for the magic of Christmas, even with Santa and the promise of gifts I always knew growing up what the “reason for the season” was, but buying, hiding, wrapping, and sneaking presents is about the extend of the magical effort I feel needs to be put fourth into this holiday.

So there’s three whole reasons why my children won’t have and Elf on the Shelf – but mostly it’s because he creeps me out.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to only rely on Santa for the magic of Christmas. Here are some of the other traditions we plan on doing with our future children.

1) An Advent calendar (My mom only let us have a “Religious image, but not sure I will hang tough with that one.)
2) Writing a letter to Santa.
3) Driving around to see Christmas lights – I love doing this. In fact, Kevin and I did this Thursday night.
4) Visiting Santa at the mall – once they’re old enough to understand what’s going on.
5) Leaving  cookies for Santa and carrots for his reindeer… and some eggnog (spiked with whisky, but shh, the children won’t know.)
6) Putting baby Jesus in the manger on Christmas morning.

What are some of your favorite non-elf related Christmas traditions? And please, I need no convincing – Elf on the Shelf will not exist in our household regardless, but I’d love to hear some of your favorite Elf on the Shelf activities!

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